Hi Friend,

There I was driving in the slow lane at 5:30 a.m. on my way to the gym and the left lane felt like they were traveling 100 MPH. I was content with my pace until out of nowhere a truck quickly approached me from behind. It swerved around me and sped ahead, then moved back into my lane, and then sped around of a few more cars, moving in and out of our lane. Instinctively I felt like I to wanted to catch up or move over to the fast lane and pass! (Have I mentioned I’m a bit competitive?)

Instantly I felt the Lord whisper, stay in your lane and keep your pace. I responded in my head, but I want to go as fast as everyone else. I don’t want to be left behind. He whispered pay no mind to those in the left lane; they aren’t going where you’re headed. Then as I exited there was that truck just two cars ahead of me sitting at the light. The Lord said, see everyone headed where you’re going eventually arrives at the destination regardless of how fast they go.

Oh, friend, this conversation between God and me had nothing to do with cars, and everything to do with being content. 

Sometimes we feel like we’re living in the slow lane and everyone is either passing us by in the fast lane or weaving in and out of our lane and advancing faster than we are. But let me share with you the word of the Lord that morning. He clearly spoke if we keep our eyes on those in the left lane and try and keep up with them, we will end up somewhere we were never called to be. And if we try to keep up with those in our lane who are moving ahead faster, it’s just wasting unnecessary energy because we’ll all end up there eventually. 

John Ortberg, in the book Soul Keeping, says “Ruthlessly eliminate hurry from your life.” I think for the first time ever I’m beginning to understand the power in this. It’s needless to rush or try and keep up with those on their journey especially when ours is so perfectly designed for us. 

God has set us in our lane, at a pace we can handle, going in the direction He has ordained. When we make peace with this lane and the speed, it releases a level of freedom I do not yet have words to explain. But what I can share is it leaves confidence in my knower that we will arrive at our destination right on time, and not a minute late or a second early. 

Your friend in faith,

Mentor Tips

Difficult Conversations:

Having to navigate a difficult conversation is one of the most challenging skills to grow, mostly because we’d rather avoid it than deal with it. Craig Groeschel says that every major issue was once a minor issue that was ignored. Ouch! In raising kids, being married almost 30 years, and running a ministry, I have made my fair share of mistakes in conflict resolution and difficult conversations, which means I have also learned a few things along the way, too.

Three questions I ask myself before entering into a difficult conversation:

• What’s the result I’m desiring?
  When I know the result I am looking for then my entire conversation will be aimed in that direction.

• What’s a “me issue” and what’s a “you issue”?
  Knowing what issues I have to own and what issues are not my responsibility helps me stay out of the weeds trying to convince, change, or fix what was never my responsibility.

• What are my non-negotiables?
  It would be great if we could get everything we want, but that’s just not life. Understanding that not every mountain is worth dying on helps determine what matters most, and what you’re willing to compromise on.

Here is an excellent TEDx talk by Madeline Poultridge on Turning Conflict into Conversations.